Waitf ul  Watching 


JAMES  L.  FORD 


.  OF  CALIF.  LIBRARY,  LOS  AUGELES 


SIZING  UP 
UNCLE    SAM 

By    GEORGE    FITCH 

Author  of 
"  The  Big  Strike  at  SiwasA,"  etc. 

DO  you  know  your  United 
States?  Not  unless  you 
have  read  this  compendium 
of  amazing  information  by 
George  Fitch.  With  his 
characteristic  dry  humor  he 
has  summed  up  the  charac- 
teristics of  our  states,  cities, 
leading  citizens  (including 
George  Washington)  politi- 
cal phenomena,  fads,  pas- 
times,bragging  points,  draw- 
backs and  problems,  etc. 

Each  little  article  is  full  of 
side-splitting  shots — and  for 
that  matter  of  very  keen  obser- 
vation. He  has  overlooked 
very  little  and  faithfully  de- 
scribes what  he  saw  as  he 
sees  it  —  be  it  Niagara  or  the 
Ham  Sandwich. 

Here  is  a  book  to  pick  up  re- 
peatedly. As  a  rest  for  a  tired  brain 
or  an  exhilarating  draft  of  pure 
humor,  it  is  just  the  thing.  No  one 
can  be  too"  high-brow"  to  appreciate 
it,  nor  will  it  pall  on  the  non- 
bookish. 

With  humorous  map — 12mo, 
$1.00  net. 


WAITFUL 
WATCHING 

or  Uncle  Sam  and  the  Fight 
in  Dame  Europe's  School 


By  JAMES  L.  FORD 
Author  of ' '  The  Literary  Shop, ' '  etc. 

A  satire  on  the  Great  War  and 
Uncle  Sam's  part  in  it — with  a 
moral  driven  home  as  only  clever 
satire  can  drive  it. 

A  schoolboy  fight  is  raging 
in  Dame  Europa's  School. 
Sammy  lives  across  the  big 
pond  and  goes  to  Madam  Colum- 
bia's Mercantile  Academy  with 
a  lot  of  smaller  chaps.  General 
Bigbusiness  is  his  favorite 
professor.  Sammy  studies  so 
well  under  him  that  he  wins 
an  unabridged  dictionary  for 
prize! 

Every  phase  of  the  War  is  touch- 
ed off  inimitably.  The  points  are 
clear  in  spite  of  the  fun,  and  their 
meaning-  tremendous. 

Here  is  a  book  you  ought  to  read. 

Illustrated.    Cloth,  16mo. 
Net  60  cents. 


'Suddenly  poor  Sammy  realized  that  he  had  been  led  into 
a  hornet's  nest"  — Page  4 


Wailful  Watching 

or 

Uncle  Sam  and  the  Fight 
in  Dame  Europa's  School 

By 

James  L.  Ford 

Author  of  "The  Literary  Shop,"  "The  Great 
Mirage,"  "Bohemia  Invaded,"  etc. 


Illustrated  by  Reginald  Birch 

New  York 

Frederick  A.  Stokes  Company 
Publishers 


Copyright,  1916,  by 
FREDERICK  A.  STOKES  COMPANY 

Copyright,  1916,  by 
THE  VAKITY  FAIR  PUBLISHING  Co.,  INC. 


A II  rights  reserved 


ILLUSTRATIONS 

'Suddenly  poor  Sammy  realized  that  he  had 

been  led  into  a  hornets'  nest"  Frontispiece 


FACING 
PAGE 


"But,  to  his  rage  and  amazement,  little  Al- 
bert valiantly  opposed  the  bully's  pas- 
sage"   22 

"  'When  are  you  coming  over  to  help  us?'  "     44 

"Uncle   Sam  hurled  his  trusted  dictionary 

into  the  troubled  waters  of  the  pond"     54 


2129434 


WAITFUL  WATCHING 


WAITFUL  WATCHING 


UNCLE  SAM,  as  he  is  affectionately 
termed  by  the  smaller  lads  who  look  to 
him  for  protection,  is  the  biggest  boy 
in  Madame  Columbia's  Mercantile 
Academy  and  almost  as  large  as  the 
largest  boy  in  Dame  Europa's  School. 
On  a  certain  hot  day  in  the  early  sum- 
mer of  the  present  year  of  grace,  1916, 
he  was  led  by  a  train  of  circumstances, 
which  it  is  my  purpose  to  narrate  in  due 
course,  to  enter  the  garden  of  a  boy 
named  Pedro,  in  order  to  chastise  him 
for  his  hostile  acts.  Pedro's  garden  is 
large  and  uncultivated,  abounding  in 
jagged  rocks  and  semi-tropical  vegeta- 
tion. Its  climate  is  hot  and  it  is  infested 


Wailful    Watching 


with  poisonous  reptiles  and  insects.  In 
short,  it  is  a  place  to  be  avoided  during 
the  heated  term,  and  it  was  only  the 
jeers  of  his  schoolmates  and  the  prick- 
ings of  his  own  laggard  conscience  that 
induced  Uncle  Sam  to  undertake  this 
disagreeable  expedition. 

Very  cautiously  he  advanced,  picking 
his  way  through  the  rocky  defiles  and 
stepping  gingerly,  for  he  had  a  whole- 
some fear  of  snakes.  He  could  see 
Pedro  retreating  before  him,  and  from 
time  to  time  the  sound  of  hoarse  gut- 
turals told  him  that  his  wily  enemy  was 
not  alone.  Suddenly  poor  Sammy 
heard  the  buzzing  of  angry  insects,  and 
realized  that  he  had  been  led  into  a  hor- 
net's nest.  Relying  on  his  great  size, 
which  was  altogether  out  of  proportion 
to  his  intelligence,  he  had  neglected  to 
[  4  ] 


Wailful    Watching 


prepare  for  the  fight  and  the  enraged 
hornets  stung  him  through  his  thin 
clothing,  while  Pedro  assailed  him  with 
a  shower  of  missiles.  The  hoarse  gut- 
tural voice  was  now  raised  in  ironic 
laughter,  and  in  the  crafty  dark  face 
that  leered  at  him  through  the  shrub- 
bery., Sammy  recognized  one  of  Dame 
Asia '.;  pupils  who  had  long  cherished 
a  bitter  grudge  against  him. 

How  came  Uncle  Sam  into  this  un- 
fortunate predicament?  This  is  the 
story,  now  told  in  full  for  the  first  time. 


From  the  wide  playground  that 
stretched  down  to  the  shore  of  the  pond 
that  separated  the  school  from  the  Se- 
lect Finishing  Academy  of  Dame  Eu- 
ropa  on  the  eastern  shore,  Sammy  had 
long  gazed  with  feelings  of  admiration 
[  5  ] 


Wailful    Watching 


and  envy  at  the  pupils  of  the  more  aris- 
tocratic institution,  affecting  to  despise 
them  for  their  effeminacy,  yet  keenly 
envious  of  their  personal  distinction 
and  savoir  faire,  of  whose  lack  he  was 
painfully,  even  morbidly,  conscious. 
To  the  west  of  the  playground  was  an- 
other pond  and  beyond  this  was  Dame 
Asia's  Oriental  Academy  of  Learning, 
where  the  arts  of  dissimulation  were 
taught  in  an  incomparable  manner. 
His  nearest  neighbor  was  a  turbulent 
lad  named  Pedro,  who  had  long  been  a 
thorn  in  his  flesh  and  for  whose  con- 
duct, as  well  as  for  that  of  the  smaller 
boys  in  his  own  school,  Uncle  Sam  held 
himself  responsible. 

Pedro,  who  had  always  defied  and 
outwitted  the  truant  officers,  had  more 
than  once  excited  the  wrath  of  Dame 
[  6  ] 


Wailful    Watching 


Europa,  and  only  escaped  pummeling 
by  the  intervention  of  Sammy,  who 
would  shake  the  Big  Stick  given  him 
years  before  by  a  boy  named  Monroe, 
and  declare  that  no  one  should  cross  the 
pond  with  punitive  intent. 

Because  of  his  great  size,  which  was 
altogether  out  of  proportion  to  his 
years,  Sammy  had  firmly  believed  him- 
self to  be  the  strongest  boy  in  the  whole 
schoolboy  world.  Self-willed,  undis- 
ciplined, generous  and  kind  hearted, 
and  having  the  run  of  a  playground  so 
large  and  well-wooded  that  he  could 
easily  hide  from  his  teachers,  he  spent 
more  time  in  studying  and  imitating 
Dame  Europa's  lads,  especially  his 
elder  brother,  Johnny  Bull,  than  he  did 
over  his  books.  The  same  teachers 
were  employed  in  both  schools,  but 


Wailful    Watching 


Sammy  paid  but  scant  heed  to  their 
ministrations.  He  laughed  at  Miss 
Experience — the  wisest  of  them  all  and 
the  strictest  disciplinarian  as  well — and 
turned  a  deaf  ear  to  the  words  of  Pro- 
fessor Efficiency  and  old  Doctor  Thor- 
oughness, utterly  disregarding  the  fact 
that  every  one  of  those  excellent  peda- 
gogues was  held  in  high  esteem  by  the 
wise  Dame  Europa,  whose  system  of 
education  he  admitted  was  superior  to 
his  own. 

Sam  had  many  of  the  faults  common 
to  immature  youth,  one  of  which  was  a 
naive  vanity  that  constantly  sought 
new  forms  of  expression.  He  never 
failed  to  exhibit  his  delight  when  any 
of  the  other  boys  flattered  him,  which 
they  did  in  the  grossest  manner  when- 
[  8  ] 


Wailful    Watching 


ever  they  wanted  anything.  And  when 
even  this  insincere  praise  was  not  forth- 
coming, he  patted  himself  on  the  back, 
an  art  in  which  practise  had  long  since 
rendered  him  ambidextrous.  He  was 
very  fond  of  poking  his  nose  into  the 
affairs  of  others — "reforming"  them, 
he  called  it — and  not  infrequently  as- 
sembled himself  into  a  commission  or 
committee  for  the  purpose  of  reform- 
ing himself. 

There  was  one  instructor,  however, 
to  whose  precepts  he  listened  only  too 
readily,  and  that  was  General  Bigbiz- 
ness,  a  charlatan  whose  breezy  self-as- 
surance and  loud  talk  had  made  such  a 
deep  impression  on  Madame  Columbia, 
who  was  far  less  sophisticated  than 
Dame  Europa,  that  she  engaged  him 
[  9  ] 


Wailful    Watching 


exclusively  for  her  school  and  adver- 
tised the  fact  widely  in  the  hope  of  se- 
curing more  pupils. 

With  much  shrewdness  the  General 
won  the  heart  of  his  employer  by  tell- 
ing her  that  the  course  of  instruction  in 
her  Mercantile  Academy  was  vastly  su- 
perior to  that  of  Dame  Europa,  who 
paid  much  attention  to  the  classic  and 
modern  languages  as  well  as  to  music, 
literature  and  general  cultivation. 
For  such  things,  he  declared,  "the  world 
has  no  use  nowadays,"  and  he  assured 
her  that  the  boys  who  succeeded  in  life 
were  those  who  devoted  their  entire  at- 
tention to  such  practical  matters  as  the 
making  of  various  articles  and  selling 
them  to  the  other  boys. 

Barter  and   exchange  of  all  kinds 

were  encouraged  in  both  schools  as  part 

[10] 


Waitful    Watching 


of  the  preparation  for  the  serious  com- 
mercial transactions  of  later  life,  and 
the  boys  had  a  currency  of  their  own  in 
which  their  operations  were  carried  on. 
By  following  the  General's  advice  and 
devoting  himself  to  trade,  instead  of  to 
the  development  of  his  mind,  Sammy 
managed  to  acquire  a  great  deal  of  this 
currency  and  to  keep  himself  supplied 
with  candy,  cake  and  expensive  toys. 
Miss  Experience,  who  knew  the  history 
of  schools,  teachers  and  schoolboys  for 
many,  many  years,  tried  to  warn  him  of 
the  inevitable  result  of  filling  his  pock- 
ets merely  that  he  might  play  games 
and  overload  his  stomach  with  un- 
wholesome sweets,  but  General  Bigbiz- 
ness  ridiculed  her  as  a  sour  old  maid 
whose  advice  was  not  worth  consider- 
ing. 

[11] 


Waitful    Watching 


"See  how  much  better  off  you  are 
since  I  came  to  the  school!"  said  the  old 
charlatan.  "You've  got  more  toys  and 
better  ones  and  more  candy  and  cake 
and  pie  than  any  boy  living.  Before 
long  you'll  have  every  dollar  of  cur- 
rency there  is  in  the  land,  and  then  any 
boy  who  needs  spending  money  will 
have  to  borrow  it  of  you.  It's  in  antici- 
pation of  that  time  that  I've  started  my 
class  in  High  Finance." 

The  truth  of  these  words  was  so  ap- 
parent to  Sammy  that  he  did  not  at- 
tempt to  deny  them.  That  he  was  the 
richest  lad  in  the  whole  schoolboy  world 
he  firmly  believed,  but  that  the  treas- 
ures he  was  laying  up  were  already  ap- 
pealing to  the  cupidity  of  certain  dis- 
honest lads  never  occurred  to  him. 

So  Sam  continued  to  study  with  dili- 
[12] 


Wailful    Watching 


gence  under  his  favorite  teacher  and  the 
latter  rewarded  him  with  a  prize  in  the 
shape  of  an  unabridged  dictionary,  call- 
ing his  attention  to  the  great  number 
and  variety  of  the  words  that  it  con- 
tained and  assuring  him  that  they  could 
be  used  as  a  means  of  settling  disputes, 
thus  saving  much  time  and  currency  be- 
sides enabling  him  to  avoid  the  personal 
encounters  in  which  the  other  boys  fre- 
quently indulged,  to  the  ruin  of  their 
clothes  and  the  alarming  disfigurement 
of  their  features. 

Now,  in  Dame  Europa's  School,  as 
well  as  in  that  of  Madame  Columbia, 
each  pupil  has  a  little  garden  in  which 
to  carry  on  some  industry  like  manu- 
facturing or  the  growing  of  fruits  and 
vegetables.  Dame  Europa's  gardens 
are  much  smaller  than  those  of  her  rival 
[13] 


Wailful    Watching 


beyond  the  pond,  and  the  question  of 
their  boundaries  has  caused  many  dis- 
putes and  such  bitter  animosities  that 
the  wiser  and  stronger  boys  have  more 
than  once  been  obliged  to  interfere  and 
settle  matters  with  the  strong  hand  of 
authority.  And,  as  these  stronger  lads 
could  not  always  agree  among  them- 
selves, two  rival  groups  were  formed, 
ostensibly  for  the  protection  of  the 
smaller  lads  and  the  preservation  of  the 
established  boundaries,  but  in  reality 
with  a  furtive  eye  to  the  acquisition  of 
more  land.  Each  of  these  two  groups 
kept  a  watchful  and  anxious  eye  on  cer- 
tain hot-headed,  pugnacious  little  lads 
who  were  always  ready  to  fight  at  the 
drop  of  a  hat.  One  of  these  turbulent 
spirits  was  little  Peter,  and  it  was  on 
the  boundary  line  between  his  garden 
[14] 


Wailful    Watching 


and  that  of  the  haughty  Franz  Josef 
that  the  great  fight,  into  which  nearly 
all  of  the  other  pupils  were  subse- 
quently drawn,  had  its  inception. 

Because  of  a  deadly  affront,  for 
which  Peter  disclaimed  all  responsibil- 
ity, his  arrogant  neighbor  demanded 
such  abject  apology  and  exorbitant 
reparation  that  the  little  fellow  de- 
clared he  would  fight  first.  He  had  al- 
ready been  assured  of  the  aid  of  his  big 
cousin,  Nicholas,  whose  garden,  the 
largest  in  all  the  school,  was  contiguous 
to  that  of  Franz  Josef. 

Nicholas  was  self-willed,  rough  in 
manner,  strong  in  arm  and  brave  in 
battle,  and  now  when  he  planted  him- 
self on  the  edge  of  his  garden  and 
warned  Franz  Josef  to  be  careful  how 
he  attacked  his  small  neighbor,  all  the 
[15] 


Wailful    Watching 


boys  realized  that  the  great  fight,  for 
which,  to  tell  the  truth,  so  many  of  them 
had  been  spoiling,  had  broken  out  at 
last.  Nor  were  they  surprised  when 
Junker  Hans,  a  strong,  sturdy  lad, 
who  had  been  cunningly  egging  Franz 
Josef  on,  told  Nicholas  that  he  must 
keep  his  hands  off  his  next  door  neigh- 
bor and  let  Peter  take  the  pummeling 
he  so  richly  deserved.  But  Nicholas 
scorned  to  take  orders  from  any  one; 
moreover  every  member  of  the  group 
to  which  he  belonged  was  bound  to 
come  to  the  help  of  one  who  was  at- 
tacked. 

Now  while  Dame  Europa's  pupils 
were,  for  the  most  part,  scions  of  aristo- 
cratic families,  Junker  Hans  was  of  the 
humblest  peasant  birth.  Fully  aware 
of  his  faults  and  limitations,  he  had  con- 
[16] 


Wailful    Watching 


stantly  sought  to  improve  himself,  and 
had  not  only  been  a  diligent  student, 
but  had  also  kept  himself  in  the  best 
physical  condition,  for,  in  his  secret 
heart,  he  aspired  to  be  not  only  the  cock 
of  his  own  school  but  also  that  of  every 
other  like  institution  in  the  land.  His 
teachers,  especially  Miss  Experience 
and  Professor  Efficiency,  spoke  in  the 
highest  terms  of  his  industry  and  wil- 
lingness to  submit  to  wholesome  disci- 
pline, and  predicted  for  him  a  brilliant 
future.  Under  their  instruction  this 
young  peasant  lad  had  acquired  the 
thinking  habit  and  had  invented  many 
articles  which  he  sold  to  the  other  boys 
to  defray  the  cost  of  his  own  education. 
In  this  work,  he  compelled  certain 
smaller  boys  who  were  his  allies,  but 
whom  he  treated  rather  as  his  slaves,  to 
[17] 


Waitful    Watching 


give  him  their  services,  and  thus  it  came 
to  pass  that  his  trade  became  too  large 
for  his  little  domain  and  he  was  casting 
an  envious  eye  on  the  gardens  of  his 
neighbors. 

In  fact,  his  gaze  had  wandered  long 
ago  across  the  pond  and  lingered 
covetously  on  the  rich  lands  of  Pedro 
and  Uncle  Sam  and  the  huge  treasure 
house  of  currency  acquired  by  the  latter 
in  the  course  of  trade.  All  unknown 
to  either  lad,  Hans  had  laid  his  plans 
for  appropriating  everything  to  him- 
self. Unscrupulous  in  his  methods 
and  well  versed  in  the  arts  of  dissimula- 
tion, he  had  cultivated  friendly  rela- 
tions with  the  simple-minded  Sammy, 
by  a  course  of  flattery  and  cajolery  that 
concealed  his  real  purpose,  while  at  the 
same  time  he  had  cunningly  incited 
[18] 


Waitful    Watching 


Pedro  to  wanton  acts  of  hostility 
against  his  neighbor,  in  order  that  the 
latter's  attention  might  be  turned  in 
that  direction. 

In  years  past  Hans  had  not  scrupled 
to  administer  a  sound  beating  to  Fran- 
ces Gallia,  the  prettiest  and  most  co- 
quettish pupil  in  the  good  Dame's  co- 
educational establishment,  and  Frances 
still  cherished  hopes  of  revenge.  It 
was  this  fight 1 — so  short,  sharp  and 
decisive  that  it  was  finished  before  the 
other  boys  fairly  realized  that  it  had 
begun — that  made  Junker  Hans  cock 
of  the  walk,  and  it  was  in  that  capacity 
that  he  now  stepped  bravely  up  to 
Nicholas  and  threatened  him  with  his 
mailed  fist.  Then,  as  it  seemed  to  his 

i  An  account  of  this  fight  was  written  by  the  late 
Richard  Grant  White  under  the  title,  "The  Fight  in 
Dame  Europa's  School." 

[19] 


Waitful    Watching 


suspicious  mind  that  Frances  Gallia 
was  making  faces  at  him  over  her  gar- 
den wall,  he  determined  to  attack  her 
before  she  should  have  a  chance  to  pitch 
into  him,  so  he  summoned  his  smaller 
vassals,  whom  he  had  long  since  drilled 
into  a  firm  belief  in  his  own  omnipo- 
tence and  in  the  virtue  of  implicit  obedi- 
ence to  his  will,  and  with  these  under 
his  command  attacked  Frances  and 
Nicholas  simultaneously. 

Between  the  large  garden  of  Junker 
Hans  and  the  far  more  beautiful  do- 
main of  Frances  lay  the  small  plot  oc- 
cupied by  a  little  chap  named  Albert, 
and  cultivated  by  him  with  a  skill  that 
commanded  the  envy  and  admiration 
of  the  whole  school.  Indeed,  so  stead- 
ily had  Albert  devoted  himself  to  the 
[20] 


Waitful    Watching 


care  of  his  few  acres  and  to  their  taste- 
ful adornment  that  he  had  never  been 
regarded  as  a  fighter,  and  so  Hans  now 
gruffly  commanded  him  to  step  aside 
that  he  might  walk  across  his  land  and 
punish  Frances  for  her  malicious  dis- 
tortions of  visage.  That  was  the  trivial 
reason  that  he  gave  for  his  unwarranted 
attack  on  a  fellow  pupil  who  had  done 
him  no  harm,  his  real  reason  being  his 
wish  to  acquire  some  of  Frances  Gal- 
lia's  garden,  which  she  had  adorned  by 
the  exercise  of  an  artistic  taste  that 
was  all  her  own  and  in  which  she  had  no 
rival  among  Dame  Europa's  pupils. 
Hans  was  specially  covetous  of  a  small 
strip  that  bordered  on  the  big  pond,  be- 
lieving that  its  possession  would  make 
him  a  more  formidable  power  than  ever 


Wailful    Watching 


in  the  great  schoolboy  world  and  per- 
haps facilitate  his  plan  to  cross  the  wide 
water  and  rob  Pedro  and  Sammy. 

It  was  with  this  acquisitive  purpose 
in  mind  that  he  shouted  to  young  Al- 
bert, and  roughly  bade  him  stand  aside, 
not  doubting  that  he  would  obey.  But, 
to  his  rage  and  amazement,  the  little 
boy  quickly  armed  himself  with  such 
weapons  as  were  nearest  at  hand  and 
valiantly  opposed  the  bully's  passage, 
at  the  same  time  calling  to  the  other 
lads  for  aid.  Johnny  Bull  heard  his 
cry  and  warned  the  angry  peasant  lad 
to  desist,  reminding  him  that  they  had 
both  long  since  signed  a  paper  guaran- 
teeing Albert  from  intrusion. 

But  Hans  had  never  learned  to  speak 
or  even  to  respect  the  truth,  as  had  the 
better  bred  boys  in  the  school,  and  he 


7 


"But,  to    \\is   rage   and   amazement,   little   Albert   valiantly 
opposed  the  bully's  passage"          — Page  ## 


Waitful    Watching 


was  indignant  with  Johnny  for  consid- 
ering a  mere  scrap  of  paper  an  obstacle 
to  anybody's  ambition.  So  he  fell 
upon  his  small  neighbor  with  his  brass 
knuckled  fists  and  forthwith  there  en- 
sued a  fight  that  will  never  be  forgotten 
by  the  pupils  of  Dame  Europa's  School. 
Never  in  the  history  of  that  institution 
had  a  boy  of  Albert's  diminutive  size 
been  so  cruelly  beaten  by  a  bully ;  never 
had  the  School  witnessed  a  more  gallant 
resistance  against  overwhelming  odds. 
The  contest  was  so  fierce  and  the  shout- 
ing of  the  combatants  so  loud  that  boys 
for  miles  around  gathered  to  watch  the 
fray.  Albert  fought  until  he  could 
fight  no  longer  and  his  aggressor,  after 
stamping  on  the  boy's  prostrate  body 
and  kicking  him  until  the  other  lads 
cried  "Shame!"  passed  on  through  his 
[23] 


Wailful    Watching 


garden  and  entered  that  of  the  beauti- 
ful Frances.  But  the  brave  little  Al- 
bert had  not  suffered  in  vain,  for,  while 
he  was  staying  the  march  of  the  in- 
vader, his  neighbor  had  had  time  to  pre- 
pare her  defenses  and  Johnny  Bull 
to  sound  the  tocsin  summoning  his 
younger  allies  to  his  side. 

Now  Johnny  Bull's  garden  was  an 
island,  separated  by  a  wide  creek  from 
that  of  Frances,  and  adjacent  to  it  were 
the  gardens  of  Scotty  and  Pat,  two  of 
his  most  trusty  allies.  Johnny  had 
been  in  his  day  the  acknowledged  cock 
of  the  School  and  as  such  had  fre- 
quently enriched  himself  at  the  expense 
of  his  fellows,  who,  largely  speaking, 
had  no  love  for  him,  and  openly  ridi- 
culed his  pretentions  and  his  bullying 
manner.  At  the  breaking  out  of  the 


Waitful    Watching 


fight,  there  was  but  one  boy  in  the 
School  who  believed  Johnny  to  be  all 
that  he  had  boasted,  and  that  was 
Johnny  himself.  In  schoolboy  slang, 
the  rest  had  been  "on  to  him"  for  some 
time,  and  none  knew  him  as  thoroughly 
as  did  Junker  Hans,  who  had  studied 
him  closely  for  several  terms. 

In  Johnny  Bull,  as  in  all  boys,  both 
good  and  evil  traits  were  blended. 
Among  his  worst  faults  were  his  Phari- 
saical pretense  of  a  virtue  superior  to 
that  of  his  fellows,  and  a  conceit  which 
took  the  form  of  a  supreme  confidence 
in  his  own  robust  powers  and  his  inabil- 
ity to  go  wrong.  Because  of  this  con- 
ceit, Dame  Europa's  excellent  corps  of 
teachers  had  found  it  difficult  to  impart 
any  instruction  to  his  sluggish  brain. 
Miss  Experience  had  long  regarded 
[25] 


Waitful    Watching 


him  as  hopeless,  though  she  had  on  sev- 
eral occasions  stood  him  up  in  a  corner 
with  a  dunce  cap  on  his  head  as  a  warn- 
ing to  the  others.  He  had  worn  this 
cap  years  before  after  two  squabbles 
with  his  own  younger  brother  across  the 
pond;  again  when  he  had  burnt  his 
fingers  while  pulling  a  bit  of  Turkish 
paste  off  the  fire  for  Frances  to  eat; 
again  when  Hans  had  cunningly  per- 
suaded him  to  keep  his  hands  off  while 
he  thrashed  the  same  Frances,  and 
again  when  he  had  gone  forth — against 
the  dictates  of  his  better  self — to  beat  a 
small  but  courageous  boy  in  Dame 
Ethiopia's  far  distant  school.  His 
prestige  as  a  fighter  rested  largely  on 
his  victory  over  an  audacious  boy 
named  Boney  who,  many  years  before, 
had  appropriated  to  himself  the  gar- 
[26] 


Waitful    Watching 


dens  of  many  of  the  other  pupils  and 
become  so  strong  that  Dame  Europa 
commanded  the  others  to  make  com- 
mon cause  against  him.  In  this  fight, 
which  was  not  ended  until  Boney  had 
been  driven  from  the  School,  Johnny 
had  shown  himself  a  boy  of  courage  and 
prowess,  which  is  all  the  more  to  his 
credit  when  we  remember  that  he  stood 
in  such  deathly  awe  of  Boney  that  he 
could  hardly  sleep  at  night.  It  was 
Johnny  who  administered  the  coup  de 
grace,  after  which  he  had  returned  in 
triumph  to  his  own  garden  and  reared 
several  monuments  to  himself.  As 
time  went  on  he  forgot  the  aid  that  he 
had  received  from  Alec,  the  previous 
occupant  of  Nicholas'  garden,  and  from 
Hans,  then  a  small  lad,  who  had  arrived 
on  the  field  of  action  in  the  nick  of  time 
[27] 


Wailful    Watching 


and  delivered  two  or  three  body  blows 
to  the  common  foe. 

All  this  he  forgot,  and  actually  be- 
lieved that  he  had  thrashed  Boney 
single-handed,  after  the  manner  de- 
scribed on  the  many  monuments 
erected  by  his  own  hand  to  his  own 
glory.  Constantly  reminded  of  his 
own  prowess  by  these  monuments, 
Johnny  had  long  since  relaxed  in  physi- 
cal training,  though  he  still  traded  jack 
knives  with  his  fellow  pupils  without 
giving  evidence  of  failing  mental  pow- 
ers. He  grew  slothful  and  gluttonous, 
and,  by  indulging  his  appetite  for 
candy,  pastry  and  other  unwholesome 
sweets,  acquired  a  huge  paunch,  while 
his  arms  and  legs  grew  proportionately 
weak.  Of  all  this  Junker  Hans  was 
well  aware,  for,  thanks  to  Dr.  Thor- 
[28] 


Waitful    Watching 


oughness,  he  had  learned  the  value  of 
rightly  estimating  not  only  his  own 
strength  but  that  of  a  possible  enemy 
as  well. 

But  Johnny  had  many  good  traits, 
among  which  were  courage  in  the  final 
extremity,  a  love  of  justice,  and  a  suffi- 
cient respect  for  the  truth  to  regard  his 
own  signature  as  a  sacred  thing.  He 
could  not  accept  Junker  Hans'  plea 
that  a  solemn  covenant  was  a  mere 
scrap  of  paper  to  be  torn  up  and 
thrown  away  at  the  signatory's  con- 
venience, and  it  was  this  belief,  blended 
with  a  fear  that  Hans  would  despatch 
Albert  and  Frances  and  then  cross  the 
ditch  and  attack  him  that  caused 
Johnny  to  come  to  the  little  fellow's  aid. 
At  the  same  time  he  shouted  across  the 
pond  to  Uncle  Sam:  "Aren't  you  com- 
[29] 


Waitful    Watching 


ing  into  this  fight?  You  ought  at  least 
to  make  a  kick  against  the  way  Junker 
Hans  is  pitching  into  little  Albert!" 

Sammy  seized  his  dictionary,  hastily 
scanned  its  pages  and  then  shouted  in 
reply:  "I'm  too  proud  to  fight." 

Just  then  Pedro  assailed  him  with  a 
shower  of  sharp  pebbles,  in  dodging 
which  and  in  listening  to  the  advice  of 
General  Bigbizness,  Sam's  attention 
was  quickly  diverted.  The  General 
urged  him  to  devote  himself  to  the  mak- 
ing and  selling  of  sticks,  arrows,  sling 
shots  and  other  articles  necessary  to  the 
carrying  on  of  the  big  fight,  remarking 
in  his  shrewd  way  that  the  misfortune 
of  one  boy  was  the  opportunity  of  an- 
other. 

So  Uncle  Sam  shook  his  fist  at  his 
unruly  neighbor  and  shouted:  "You'd 
[30] 


Wailful    Watching 


better  look  out!  I'm  going  to  watch 
and  wait  if  you  don't  behave  yourself!" 
Having  uttered  these  words  of  sol- 
emn portent,  he  turned  to  the  making 
of  slings,  bows  and  arrows,  in  which 
trade  Hans  had  in  times  past  shown 
great  energy  and  skill  and  had  never 
scrupled  to  supply,  to  his  own  profit, 
both  sides  of  a  dispute.  Well  versed  in 
the  convenient  art  of  forgetfulness  he 
now  shook  his  fist  angrily  at  Samuel 
and  warned  him  not  to  furnish  his, 
Hans',  enemies  with  weapons.  At  the 
same  time  one  or  two  of  Sam's  small 
fellow  pupils  reminded  their  protector 
that  it  might  be  well  to  keep  some  of 
the  hand-slings,  sticks  and  stones  for 
use  against  Pedro,  and  to  construct 
some  flying  machines  for  their  own  use. 
To  this  voice  of  prudence  as  well  as  to 
[31] 


Waitful    Watching 


the  protesting  Hans,  Sam  merely  said: 
"We  must  watch  and  wait,"  and  went 
on  with  his  making  and  selling,  serene 
in  the  approval  of  General  Bigbizness. 

Thereupon  Hans  seized  his  new  blow 
gun,  an  invention  of  his  own,  and 
rained  half  a  dozen  pebbles  on  the 
cheeks  of  the  boy  across  the  pond,  caus- 
ing him  to  utter  a  cry  of  angry  pain, 
while  the  other  lads  stood  gazing  in 
astonishment  and  wondering  what 
would  happen.  Nor  did  their  wonder 
cease  when  Sammy  extracted  from  his 
dictionary  the  words  "strict  account- 
ability" and  hurled  them  angrily  at  his 
tormentor. 

Now  Hans,   like   Uncle   Sam,   had 

long  been  a  persistent  noser  into  the 

affairs  of  the  other  boys,  but  unlike  the 

big  overgrown  lad,  he  had  not  nosed 

[32] 


Wailful    Watching 


with  the  foolish  idea  of  doing  good,  but 
for  selfish  purposes  of  his  own.  As  the 
truth  was  not  in  him,  he  had  developed 
a  genius  for  this  sinister  work  and  in  his 
school  desk  were  stored  away  complete 
and  accurate  lists  of  the  various  weap- 
ons of  defense  kept  by  the  different 
boys  in  reserve  for  emergencies.  He 
had  also  taken  pains  to  acquaint  him- 
self with  the  physical,  moral  and  mental 
qualities  of  each  of  his  young  compan- 
ions and  the  manner  in  which  they 
kept  themselves  in  training;  and  thus 
he  had  learned  of  Johnny  Bull's  condi- 
tion, due  to  his  gluttony  and  idleness. 
And  all  this  time  he  had  been  prepar- 
ing for  the  big  fight  by  secretly  making 
and  storing  up  sticks,  stones,  bows,  ar- 
rows and  slings,  together  with  bandages 
and  healing  liniments.  His  flying  ma- 
[33] 


Wailful    Watching 


chines  were  the  best  in  all  the  land  and 
he  had  secretly  perfected  a  boat  that 
could  travel  a  great  distance  under  the 
water.  Both  of  these  contrivances  he 
used  for  the  purpose  of  injuring  and 
terrorizing  his  opponents. 

Johnny  Bull  had  no  sooner  put  up 
his  fists  than  he  found  that  his  arms 
were  enfeebled  and  his  knees  shaken 
through  a  long  course  of  devotion  to  his 
own  over-fed  stomach,  and  that  a  con- 
stant and  exuberant  contemplation  of 
his  own  virtues,  as  recorded  on  his  vari- 
ous monuments,  had  rendered  his  brain 
so  sluggish  that  it  required  several 
blows  from  Hans'  well  aimed  missiles 
to  bring  him  to  a  realizing  sense  of  the 
vast  difference  between  what  he  really 
was  and  what  he  had  imagined  himself. 

Reeling  back  from  the  encounter  and 
[34] 


Waitful    Watching 


holding  a  handkerchief  to  his  bloody 
nose,  he  called  loudly  to  his  smaller  al- 
lies, bidding  them  come  to  the  aid  of 
him  whom  he  had  taught  them  to  re- 
gard as  their  natural  protector.  These 
responded  quickly  and  bravely,  for  in 
Dame  Europa's  School  the  first  duty 
of  the  protected  is  to  protect  the  pro- 
tector. And,  in  an  incredibly  short 
space  of  time,  hard-fisted,  bare-legged 
Scotty  and  pugnacious,  red-headed  Pat 
had  ranged  themselves  beside  him, 
while  from  far  across  the  pond  his 
smaller  brothers  embarked  in  their  ca- 
noes to  join  the  fray. 

Meanwhile,  the  smaller  pupils  re- 
tired behind  barricades  made  of  a 
malleable  clay  called  "strict  neutral- 
ity," where  both  sides  found  it  advisable 
to  allow  them  to  remain.  Those  in  the 
[35] 


Waitful    Watching 


immediate  neighborhood  of  Peter  were 
soon  heard  snarling  among  themselves 
and  eventually  nearly  all  of  them  were 
drawn  into  the  quarrel,  as  was  Italia,  a 
blood  relation  of  Frances  Gallia,  and, 
like  her,  a  girl  of  great  beauty  and 
spirit. 

As  for  Sam,  he  applied  a  little 
Pond's  Extract  to  his  bruised  face  and 
drew  from  his  dictionary  a  fine  assort- 
ment of  sonorous  words,  few  of  which 
contained  less  than  three  syllables. 
These  he  hurled  across  the  pond  at 
Hans,  exclaiming  triumphantly:  "That 
will  teach  you  not  to  shoot  pebbles  at 
me!"  Then  turning  a  scowling  face 
toward  Pedro,  he  added:  "This  goes 
for  you,  too!" 

The  looks  of  wonder  on  the  faces  of 
the  combatants  broadened  into  con- 
[36] 


Waitful    Watching 


temptuous  smiles.  ''What  else  are  you 
going  to  do?"  roared  Johnny  Bull. 
"Watch  and  wait?"  "No,"  rejoined 
the  other,  "I  have  decided  to  wait  and 
watch,  for  to  fight  I  am  too  proud! 
Besides  I  must  finish  these  orders  for 
my  customers." 

But  Sammy  did  much  more  than  this. 
Easily  moved  by  the  misfortunes  of 
others,  he  wept  when  he  saw  the  griev- 
ous wounds  that  the  fighters  inflicted  on 
one  another,  and,  with  a  generosity  and 
unselfishness  characteristic  of  his  simple 
nature,  he  sought  to  alleviate  their  suf- 
ferings. He  paddled  across  the  pond 
with  great  bottles  of  healing  salves  and 
rolls  of  bandages,  and  with  his  own 
hands  bound  up  the  wounds,  thereby 
gaining  but  little  gratitude  and  even 
less  respect. 

[37] 


Waitful    Watching 


In  the  old  days  of  peace,  Sam,  who 
prided  himself  rather  unduly  on  his 
keen  sense  of  humor,  had  been  wont  to 
amuse  himself  by  drawing  pictures  on 
his  slate  representing  Hans  as  a  tow- 
headed  clown  with  wooden  shoes  and  a 
foolish  cast  of  countenance,  trying  to 
build  a  flying  machine  or — still  more 
ridiculous — a  boat  to  go  under  the 
water.  He  had  laughed  heartily  at  his 
own  exquisite  wit,  and  the  other  boys 
had  shared  his  mirth,  for  nothing  ap- 
peals to  the  humorous  perception  of  a 
schoolboy  as  does  the  humiliation  of  an- 
other. It  was  Hans'  turn  now  and  his 
strident  laughter  echoed  across  the 
pond  as  he  upset  Sam's  canoes  and  pep- 
pered him  with  his  popgun.  And  all 
the  louder  did  he  laugh  when  the  other 
replied  with  volleys  from  his  dictionary. 
[38] 


Waitful    Watching 


But  Sam  did  not  laugh,  for  the  popgun 
hurt  and  the  words  did  not.  Even 
Hans'  enemies  paused  in  their  fighting 
and  swelled  the  chorus  of  laughter  at 
the  comical  spectacle  of  the  once  boast- 
ful Sammy,  the  bully  of  his  own  school, 
protecting  his  face  with  his  hands  and 
roaring  out  that  if  the  other  did  not 
stop,  he  would  watch  and  wait  until 
he  did. 

"You  must  stop  making  those  slings 
and  arrows!"  yelled  Junker  Hans  from 
across  the  water.  "You  ought  to  be 
fair  to  both  sides,  but  instead  of  that 
you're  selling  things  to  Johnny  Bull." 

"Well,  I  am  fair  to  both  sides,"  re- 
plied Sammy;  "I'm  ready  to  make 
things  for  you,  too,  if  you'll  only  give 
me  the  order." 

"But  I  can't  get  them  if  you  do  make 
[39] 


Waitful    Watching 


them!"  cried  the  other.  "My  canoes 
are  all  up  Salt  River  Creek,  and 
Johnny  Bull  won't  let  them  come  out! 
If  it  wasn't  for  you,  this  fight  would 
have  been  over  long  ago." 

To  which  the  other  made  answer  in 
one  of  his  rare  bursts  of  intelligence: 
"Yes,  and  then  you'd  be  ready  to  come 
over  here  and  lick  me." 

What  Hans  said  about  his  canoes 
was  perfectly  true.  Like  all  island- 
dwellers  Johnny  Bull  had  been  ad- 
dicted to  water  sports  since  early  child- 
hood. He  could  swim  and  dive  like  a 
duck  and  paddle  a  canoe  or  manage  a 
sailboat  better  than  any  other  lad  in 
all  the  schoolboy  world.  For  years  he 
had  spent  a  large  share  of  his  liberal  al- 
lowance of  pocket  money  on  craft  of 
all  kinds,  and  therefore  the  beginning 
[40} 


Waitful    Watching 


of  the  fight  found  him  with  a  fine  fleet 
of  boats,  well  equipped  for  racing  and 
for  fighting  as  well.  No  sooner  had  the 
fight  begun  than  he  despatched  these 
boats  and  canoes,  manned  by  his  smaller 
allies,  to  the  mouth  of  Salt  River  Creek, 
in  which  estuary  he  effectually  bottled 
up  the  fleet  of  Junker  Hans. 

Now  there  was  no  boy  in  all  the  land 
who  had  watched  the  progress  of  the 
fight  with  as  keen  an  interest  or  a 
deeper  comprehension  of  what  it  really 
signified  than  little  Fugi  Yama,  the 
brightest  pupil  in  Dame  Asia's  Ori- 
ental Academy  of  Learning.  Fugi 
was  not  popular  with  the  other  boys  for 
the  excellent  reason  that  he  was  clev- 
erer and  better  mannered  than  the  rest, 
more  cleanly  and  abstemious  in  his 
habits  and  more  tasteful  in  his  dress. 


Waitful    Watching 


Because  of  these  traits — unforgivable 
in  the  schoolboy  world — he  was  usually 
termed  a  barbarian.  Fugi  had  long 
cherished  a  righteous  grudge  against 
Junker  Hans,  and  now,  seeing  him  en- 
gaged with  his  enemies,  he  seized  cer- 
tain small  gardens  illegally  held  by 
Hans  and  made  them  his  own.  He 
cherished  an  equally  righteous  and  still 
more  bitter  grudge  against  Uncle  Sam, 
of  which  the  latter  was  uneasily  con- 
scious, but  now  too  busy  to  pay  much 
heed  to  matters  of  such  remote  contin- 
gency, for  he  had  undertaken  to  supply 
Johnny  Bull  and  his  friends  with  such 
a  quantity  of  blow  guns,  slings,  clubs 
and  missiles  that  he  was  obliged  to  put 
all  the  smaller  boys  to  work  and  to  con- 
struct several  new  wooden  sheds  in 
which  to  carry  on  their  labor.  Feeling 
[42] 


Wailful    Watching 


himself  immune  from  outside  attack,  he 
had,  like  Johnny  Bull,  neglected  his 
physical  and  moral  welfare  and  in  con- 
sequence thereof,  the  malignant  germ 
of  cowardice  had  flourished  in  his  sys- 
tem and  was  fast  undermining  his 
character.  He  tried  to  deceive  himself 
and  his  playmates  as  to  the  real  nature 
of  these  germs  by  culling  from  his  dic- 
tionary the  misleading  word  Pacifism 
and  applying  it  to  them  like  a  healing 
plaster,  and,  having  thus  blinded  his 
own  eyes  to  this  ulcer  on  his  moral  na- 
ture, he  thought  that  he  had  hidden  it 
from  the  others  as  well. 

But  Hans,  who  had  already  recog- 
nized this  Pacifism  for  what  it  really 
was,  slyly  let  loose  in  Madame  Colum- 
bia's School  a  deadly  microbe  called 
Burnstuff,  which  had  the  quality  pe- 
[43] 


Waitful    Watching 


culiar  to  itself  of  producing  sleeping 
sickness  whenever  it  came  in  contact 
with  the  germs  of  Pacifism. 

Long  before  this  the  crafty  Hans 
had  inoculated  the  simple  Sammy  with 
an  even  more  malignant  germ  called 
the  Hyphen,  and  this,  when  joined  to 
the  Burnstuff  microbe,  brought  on  a 
sharp  explosion,  followed  by  devastat- 
ing flames.  Now  these  germs  and  the 
microbe  produced  a  succession  of  con- 
flagrations in  Uncle  Sam's  wooden 
sheds  and  also  in  various  skiffs  and  ca- 
noes, laden  with  weapons,  which  were 
destroyed  as  they  lay  along  the  shore. 
While  Uncle  Sam  was  searching  in  his 
dictionary  for  a  word  that  would  con- 
ceal the  nature  of  the  Hyphen  germs 
he  was  startled  by  a  loud  wail  of  an- 
guish from  Johnny  Bull,  who  had  been 
[44] 


'When  are  you  coming  over  to  help  us  ?'  "  — Page  lf.5 


Waitful    Watching 


ejected  by  Hans  from  the  territory  of 
one  of  the  latter 's  allies  and  severely 
kicked  in  the  process. 

"When  are  you  coming  over  to  help 
us?"  bawled  Johnny,  standing  on  the 
shore  of  his  island  and  holding  both 
hands  on  the  seat  of  his  injuries. 

Now  Uncle  Sam  had  just  burned  his 
own  hands  and  singed  his  hair  and  eye- 
brows while  putting  out  the  fires 
caused  by  the  Burnstuff  microbe,  and 
he  was  in  no  mood  to  utter  a  concili- 
atory reply,  and  too  keenly  on  the 
watch  for  other  explosions  to  select  a 
suitable  phrase  from  his  dictionary. 

"Haven't  you  got  help  enough?"  he 
roared.  "You've  got  Pat  and  Scotty 
and  all  the  other  boys  and  girls  who  are 
on  your  side!  And  if  I  do  go  into  the 
quarrel — which  is  not  my  quarrel  after 
[45] 


Waitful    Watching 


all — I  shan't  be  able  to  finish  that  great 
lot  of  slings  and  blow-guns  I'm  making 
for  you.  I'll  have  to  keep  them  for  my 
own  use!" 

"But  I'm  your  elder  brother!"  wailed 
Johnny.  "Haven't  I  always  let  you 
play  my  games  and  copy  my  clothes? 
Haven't  you  always  copied  my  man- 
ners instead  of  becoming  absurdly  pol- 
ished like  Frances  Gallia?  Do  you 
want  to  see  your  own  brother  beaten  to 
a  pulp?  I  tell  you  to  come  over  here 
and  help  me!" 

"I  am  helping  you  the  best  I  know 
how,"  retorted  Sammy.  "If  it  wasn't 
for  me,  you  and  your  crowd  wouldn't 
have  anything  to  fight  with.  And  just 
look  at  all  the  bandages  and  liniments 
I've  given  you  for  nothing  just  because 
I  didn't  want  to  see  you  bleed  to  death ! 
[46] 


Waitful    Watching 


That's  more  than  you  ever  did  for  me 
when  I  had  that  trouble  with  some  of 
my  smaller  boys  a  few  terms  ago.  Did 
you  come  over  and  help  me  then?  Not 
a  bit  of  it.  On  the  contrary,  you  did 
everything  you  could  to  make  the 
trouble  worse.  Now  you  can  take  care 
of  yourself!  I've  got  all  I  can  do, 
putting  out  fires!" 

But  Sam  had  much  to  occupy  his 
mind  beside  merely  putting  out  fires, 
for  some  of  Madame  Columbia's  smaller 
pupils  who  looked  to  him  for  protec- 
tion, had  awakened  to  the  growing  need 
of  weapons  and  missiles  with  which  to 
resist  any  possible  attack  from  an 
enemy  and  their  clamoring  now  became 
so  persistent  that  their  protector  was 
again  driven  to  his  dictionary.  A  mo- 
ment later  he  was  shouting  "Prepared- 
[47] 


Wailful    Watching 


ness!"  with  so  much  vehemence  that  it 
looked  as  if  he  were  actually  going  to 
do  something.  But,  even  while  he  was 
yelling  his  loudest,  he  continued  to  fill 
orders  for  his  customers  to  the  neglect 
of  his  own  need,  while  Miss  Experience 
wept  at  sight  of  his  folly. 

All  in  vain  did  this  excellent  creature 
point  to  Johnny  Bull,  now  struggling 
valiantly  to  atone  for  the  neglect  of  her 
precepts,  and  to  the  superb  spectacle 
presented  by  Frances  Gallia,  who,  hav- 
ing had  the  sense  to  profit  by  them,  was 
defending  herself  from  the  ruthless  at- 
tack of  Junker  Hans  with  a  courage 
that  compelled  the  admiration  of  the 
entire  schoolboy  world.  Frances  did 
not,  like  Johnny  Bull,  call  upon  Sam 
for  aid,  though  she  was  justly  entitled 
to  it  because  of  assistance  that  she  had 
[48] 


Waitful    Watching 


rendered  to  him  when  he  was  a  very 
small  boy.  Professor  Efficiency  and 
Doctor  Thoroughness  added  their 
warnings  to  that  of  Miss  Experience 
by  calling  attention  to  the  manner  in 
which  Hans  had  prepared  himself  for 
the  fight  while  the  rest  of  Dame  Eu- 
ropa's  pupils  were  amusing  themselves 
on  the  playground  and  Sam  was  filling 
his  pockets  with  the  school  currency. 

Then  suddenly  the  Burnstuff  mi- 
crobe, acting  in  concert  with  the  Hy- 
phen germ,  entered  into  Pedro's  system 
and  caused  such  an  outburst  of  rage,  ac- 
companied by  fierce  volleys  of  stones  di- 
rected against  Uncle  Sam,  that  he  was 
reluctantly  compelled  to  put  up  his  fists 
in  self-defense  and  even  to  cross  the 
boundary  into  the  other's  garden  in  or- 
der to  administer  condign  punishment. 
[49] 


Wailful    Watching 


Here  he  soon  found  himself  in  a  hor- 
net's nest,  with  adders  hissing  about  his 
feet,  the  sound  of  guttural  laughter 
ringing  in  his  ears,  and  Fugi  Yama 
grinning  at  him  from  the  shrubbery, 
precisely  as  it  is  set  down  in  one  of  the 
early  pages  of  this  veracious  history. 

It  was  at  this  moment  that  he  realized 
that  his  dictionary,  practically  the  only 
weapon  that  he  had  at  hand,  was  ridicu- 
lously inadequate  as  a  means  of  punish- 
ing such  a  pugnacious  boy  as  little 
Pedro,  and  the  suspicion  that  his  im- 
plicit confidence  in  General  Bigbizness 
had  led  him  to  the  very  brink  of  serious 
disaster,  entered  his  mind  and  caused 
him  many  hours  of  uneasiness. 

One  by  one  the  difficulties  of  his  posi- 
tion loomed  up  before  him,  completely 
driving  from  his  brain  the  sense  of  se- 
[50] 


Waitful    Watching 


curity  on  which  he  had  relied.  He  saw 
now  that  not  only  was  Fugi  Yama 
watching  him  with  furtive,  malevolent 
eye,  but  that  Johnny  Bull  as  well  as 
Hans  and  Franz  Josef  entertained  in- 
imical feelings  toward  him.  If  Dame 
Europa's  boys  could  make  flying  ma- 
chines powerful  enough  to  cross  from 
one  garden  to  another,  how  soon  would 
they  build  one  strong  enough  to  cross 
the  big  pond?  Miss  Experience,  to 
whom  he  was  now  willing  to  turn  one 
reluctant  ear,  recited  pages  of  school 
history  showing  that  in  times  past  even 
the  most  embittered  enemies  had  been 
known  to  patch  up  their  quarrels  in 
order  to  make  common  cause  against 
some  weaker  boy,  and  now  Uncle  Sam 
suspected  that  he  himself  was  the  weak- 
est boy  in  the  whole  school  world,  in- 
[51] 


Wailful    Watching 


stead  of  the  strongest  as  he  had  once  be- 
lieved. Meanwhile  the  Hyphen  germ 
was  spreading  through  his  garden  and 
the  Burnstuff  microbe  was  doing  its 
deadly  work  of  arson.  In  payment  for 
what  he  was  supplying  to  his  customers, 
he  had  accepted  notes  signed  by  them 
and  endorsed  by  General  Bigbizness, 
who  was  always  ready  to  promise  any- 
thing. He  had  accounted  these  notes 
as  cash  at  a  trifle  less  than  their  face 
value,  but  now  it  occurred  to  him  that 
the  signers  might  find  themselves  un- 
willing or  unable  to  pay  and  that  the 
breezy  General  might  prove  but  a  weak 
financial  reed  to  lean  upon. 

Carrying   his    dictionary   under   his 
arm,  Sammy  picked  his  way  back  to 
the  shore  of  the  pond  and  stood  gaz- 
ing at  the  great  fight  that  was  raging 
[52] 


Wailful    Watching 


with  unabated  fierceness.  For  the  first 
time  since  it  began,  a  sense  of  his  own 
complete  isolation  and  loneliness  took 
possession  of  his  soul.  Johnny  Bull, 
who  by  this  time  had  gotten  his  second 
wind,  was  using  his  fists  as  well  as  the 
weapons  that  Sammy  had  sold  him  on 
long  credit  with  a  courage  and  deter- 
mination worthy  of  the  very  best  there 
was  in  him.  Somehow,  his  former  in- 
vitation to  Sammy  to  join  the  fray  did 
not  seem  as  absurd  and  selfish  now  as 
then.  Frances  Gallia  and  her  cousin 
Italia  were  fighting  splendidly,  too, 
and  on  the  other  side  of  the  field  Nicho- 
las was  hammering  away  at  both  Franz 
Josef  and  Junker  Hans  with  telling 
effect.  If  his  young  companions  had 
sent  him  to  Coventry  and  refused  to 
allow  him  to  take  part  in  their  games 
[53] 


Waitful    Watching 


poor  Sammy  could  not  have  felt  more 
completely  out  of  everything  than  he 
did  now. 

He  realized,  too,  with  increasing 
wretchedness  of  spirit  and  self-con- 
tempt that  in  refusing  to  come  to 
Johnny's  aid  he  had  missed  the  great- 
est opportunity  that  had  offered  itself 
since  he  first  entered  the  school — the 
double  opportunity  to  do  what  he  had 
known  all  along  was  right  and  to  make 
powerful  friends  at  the  same  time. 
After  all,  Johnny  was  his  own  elder 
brother  and  the  claims  of  blood  kinship 
should  have  been  strong  enough  to  wipe 
out  all  unpleasant  memories.  By  fre- 
quent insults  and  the  upsetting  of  his 
canoes,  to  say  nothing  of  letting  loose 
the  deadly  Burnstuff  microbe  in  his  gar- 
den, Junker  Hans  had  given  him  good 
[54] 


'Uncle  Sam  liurled  his  trusted  dictionary  into  the  troubled 
waters   of   the   pond"  — Page  55 


Wailful    Watching 


and  sufficient  reason  for  entering  the 
fray  on  his  own  account  and  now  he 
felt  that  if  he  had  done  his  share, 
Johnny,  Frances,  Fugi  Yama  and  the 
rest  would  have  recognized  him  as  a 
member  of  their  powerful  group  and 
entitled  to  their  aid  in  any  trouble  that 
the  future  might  hold  for  him.  Now 
he  realized  with  feelings  of  bitterness 
that  he  was  an  object  of  hatred  and 
contempt.  At  this  moment  one  of 
Madame  Columbia's  smaller  pupils, 
whose  soul  had  been  corroded  by  the 
Pacifism  germs,  peered  furtively  into 
the  dictionary  and  extracted  the  phrase : 
"Well,  he's  kept  us  out  of  a  fight,  any- 
way." 

In  a  sudden  outburst  of  rage  and  de- 
spair, illumined  by  gleams  of  returning 
intelligence,    Uncle    Sam    hurled    his 
[55] 


Waitful    Watching 


trusted  dictionary  into  the  troubled 
waters  of  the  pond,  convinced  that  now 
indeed  was  he  naked  to  his  enemies. 


THE    END 


[56] 


UC  SOUTHERN  REGIONAL  LIBRARY  FACILITY 


